A diary of J, living with a disability in isolation during the Covid19 outbreak. He works for Solesmith and we thought his story is one that should be shared.
Stay Home, Stay Safe.
I woke up feeling positive, today I was going to see my daughter. My car was getting dropped off to me and I was going to drive home and sit in the garden keeping a safe distance from anyone while she played. What could go wrong?
When I walked into the front room The Relative was asleep on the sofa, I woke him up being noisy in the kitchen. The Relative has suffered from sciatica for most of his life and cant sleep on a normal bed. He finds relief sleeping on the sofa where his legs can be raised. This means the only living space is also his bedroom. It’s not really a problem but it makes a small flat feel even smaller.
I had breakfast and waited in my room for what felt like years. I was getting the car at 10:00 and those next few hours went slowly. My phone beeped, ‘outside’. Buzzing, can’t wait to see her.
There is a big problem with this arrangement, I am not supposed to be in contact with anyone, and sitting in a car with someone who is not isolating is risky. It dawned on me that I wont be able to keep doing this car sharing. But for now I’m going to risk it, its only day 2 of isolation and I’ll hold my breath for the whole journey and sanitize my hands every 10 seconds.
I got in the car and my daughter was excited to see me, poor girl doesn’t realise that it’ll only be for an hour. After a minute ‘cough, cough, cough’, shit she’s got it, I’m next, this was a bad idea, I hold my breath until my face turns red, not a good idea while driving.
We get home and go into the garden, “you coming into the garden to play?” “no” was her response. This is isn’t going well I thought. I decided to water my seedlings and sit down and wait. After a while she came out and played. I had to try and keep my distance but it’s difficult, I just wanted to hug her. Then she fell off her bike, what do I do? Normally I would go and comfort her but now I can’t, I can’t go near her. I know I’ll give her a quick hug but make sure my head is a mile away from hers that might work. What a stupid idea, this arrangement really isn’t going to work, don’t know how I can go weeks on end without being around her?
Time to go home feeling more depressed then yesterday. I was starting to have an energy crash (something very normal for my illness). I spent the rest of the day lying on the bed feeling like I was dying. At least I wasn’t restless, just dead.
Tomorrow will be a better day.